Future

Future surrounds a lot of big words. Well, at least I think it does.

Whenever I think about the future, it’s like entering a whole different universe. For me, back then, my future lies in college and graduation. After? It was work, insurance, salary, rent and a whole lot of others that complicates life even more. What I never found in those words is balance. I can’t balance my time, my money, my friends, my work or even my church. I’ve always been a bad Catholic but I would like attending the mass every once in a while.

Living now, in this future I have pictured for myself years before, makes me wonder if all along we were meant to picture something else once we get it. The Future can be irritatingly predictable. But that is based on how you play your cards right. The word for my future today is patience. I need it. There is more of it in me than I ever suspected. Why do I want patience, you ask?

I know that there will be more big and bigger words in my upcoming future…because this is not it. I am happy, somehow, but I am never contented. And that’s saying something; that’s wrong. When you’re happy in where you are, what you do, who you’re with, you are supposed to be contented with what you have. I don’t know if it’s just me never settling down or if it’s my human nature contesting the difference between happiness and ‘something-else’ but I want to find out for myself and I can’t just lie around waiting for another Future of mine to come true when I know that I should get out of the door, seldom look back and keep going in looking for it.

Big words, big future. It’s all up to you. And now I’m thinking how Future, for me, resembles Living. Six letters, one word, two syllables.

 

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